ABCs of Death 2 Q-T

q is for questionnaire

Well…this gave me the willies. In case I haven’t mentioned it, one thing that always freaks me out is any sort of head trauma or surgery. In this segment, we see a man’s brain get crudely removed and placed into a gorilla’s skull. Why? Your guess is as good as mine, but based on the flashback shots it’s safe to say it has something to do with the man’s “intelligence”. I didn’t know that being able to correctly answer questions that are in every brain teaser book in existence counts as high intelligence, but I digress. I give it 4/5. I say a segment is also successful if it makes me want to know more or wish it was longer, and that’s exactly what happens here. My only complaint is the cheaply made, Halloween gorilla suit, but I’m going to let it slide for now.

r is for roulette

I think we have another case of where a segment’s biggest strength is also it’s weakness. From what I can only assume, we see 3 people in a basement, and I believe it’s set in World War II Germany. We quickly establish that while all 3 probably want to die to avoid capture, there’s only one bullet left. Here’s where things get questionable. We also realize that what’s making its way down into the basement isn’t human. I just want to know what it was. Zombies? Werewolves? I have no idea. It gets 3/5. It does any amazing job building suspense, but I think the overall payoff still left too things unanswered. It’s a shame because this could have easily been the best segment out of all 26.

s is for split

I was kind of surprised by how enthralled I was while watching this. It’s very rare for something like this to hold my attention, but I’m blown away. However…I kind of have to nitpick about the “big reveal”. So you discover your spouse is cheating. That’s enough to make anyone snap and lash out. But you decide to go one step further and slaughter your spouse’s lover’s wife and child, and then wait for the police to arrive and arrest you. I fail to see how that plan pays off in any way. You couldn’t just put sugar in someone’s gas tank? Upload reputation damaging videos to a revenge porn site? What other plans did you have before your actually thought “Nope, I’m going to murder a complete stranger’s family”? It just doesn’t make any sort of sense to me, and I feel like that is a bit extreme. That point aside, this was very well done and probably the cleanest segment as far as filming is concerned. I give it 4/5. If you don’t think about the reveal too much, it’s highly entertaining.

t is for torture porn

I love the Soska sisters, I honestly do. But this had me asking myself: “What the shit biscuits am I looking at?!” From what I gathered, this is one of those porn castings gone unbelievably wrong. Of course, it’s not the normal porn. No, it’s the incredibly misogynistic ones where women are subjected to abuse, embarrassment, and oftentimes rape. In this case, our actress gets revenge…by raping the men with tentacles. I don’t understand how something can make less sense every time I think about it. Anyways, I’ll give this 3/5…I guess. I’m just very confused. I don’t know if I should cheer because female empowerment…or if I should be very grossed out by the behavior of these men and eventual tentacle rape. Then again, this is something from the same women that did Dead Hooker in a Trunk and American Mary. I’m just going to stop thinking about this now.


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