Rapid Retrospect 4/21- 4/27

Mirror Mirror (2012) 2/5
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I started to warm up to this as I was watching it. Then it turned into social commentary and ended with a Bollywood dance sequence. It was a little confusing. The acting is…alright. Some actors are stronger than others, and I really think someone else should’ve played Snow White. The best parts of the movie are the sets. It is a gorgeous film, but that’s about it. I should mention this was directed by Tarsem Singh, the same guy that did The Cell. That explains everything you need to know.

Phase 7 (2011) 4/5
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Another end of the world flick, but it’s decent. An apartment building in locked down and quarantined because of a biological agent that has sent society into chaos. I thought this was good because it wasn’t just zombies or straight gore. The people we’re supposed to root for range from insane to unbelievably oblivious. It’s a lot of fun to watch, and it is streaming on Netflix.

Cassadaga (2011) 3/5
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Besides the horrible title, Cassadaga has several issues that bog it down. What saves it is Kelen Coleman. She’s fantastic as Lily, a deaf schoolteacher. The killer’s method’s are interesting (cutting off people’s limbs, and turning them into human marionettes), but I don’t think it was explored as much as it could’ve been. The biggest problem is the pacing and storytelling. This needs to be 20-25 minutes shorter, the plot could be told better, and the title needs to be more descriptive. Cassadaga is merely the name of the town where the story happens. That’s about it. Even though there are questionable creative choices, I still think it’s worth watching because of Coleman’s performance.

Germ Z (2013) 1/5
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A zombie flick that doesn’t have zombies. This is 28 Days Later, except jet fuel causes everyone to eat each other. However, they even tell you in the movie it’s not zombies. Then there’s this side story of a dude carrying a torch for some chick that wants to be friends with benefits. There’s really not much here, and things get worse when the film tries to be artsy at the end. Return of the Living Dead: Necropolis is better than Germ Z. Think about that for a second.

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