Doghouse (2009)

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I found this in a bargain bin in FYE. I figured it would be a gory flick filled with the British humor I love. I was right when I first saw it 3 years ago. However, my opinion changed after a second viewing. The movie is about a group of friends that plan a getaway to help a recently divorced buddy become his old self again. The only problem is the female population of their destination has turned into man-eating creatures. Writing that sentence reminds me that I really need to get started on my new section that will focus on oddly specific plots.

Anyways, our “heroes” arrive, and most of the film is just them running around the village and trying not to get tortured or maimed. Before I go any further, I have to mention I’m not one of those people that use words like “misogynistic” or “chauvinist”. But, after watching this again, I couldn’t help but notice those are perfect words to describe this movie. Outside of the implications of women turning into man-eaters, some of the dialog between the characters is absolutely disgusting. It ranges from women are nothing but nagging soul suckers to being disrespectful simply because men should be allowed to do so.

My personal favorite was the reveal as to why all of this way happening. It was powder dish detergent. That’s right: they had the balls to insert a subtle women belong in the kitchen joke. A close runner-up for most offensive joke is when the men discover a remote than emits an electronic frequency that will stop all infected women dead in their tracks, and could kill them if there’s prolonged exposure. So what do the people we’re supposed to be rooting for do? Laugh at the women while they start convulsing and bleeding from various orifices. Oh, and they spend a solid minute playing with remote by turning it on and off.

We also have our last horrible joke when someone mentions that life would be so much easier if all women were that easy to control. This was written, directed, and produced by only men. I’m half tempted to think the writer had a really bad break-up, and this was how he chose to handle it. I don’t believe one gender is better than the other. I just don’t like films like this that have an unnecessary message. If I can play devil’s advocate, I’d like to remind you that men often share the same qualities than are brought up in this movie.

I give it 2/5. The plot, tone, and the whole feeling of “men are awesome, women are demonic harpies” made me feel like I was watching something made by people who either got dumped or rejected, and never got over it. To give it some credit, it’s still gory and the special effects make-up is well done. If you want to see something with a group of friends that chose the wrong vacation spot, check out The Descent or Dead Snow.

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